I Never Minded the Little Things

My personal philosophy... summarized, because if you wanted to hear all of it, you might want to get some camping gear... It would take a good week or so to explain it all without getting you lost in metaphors and similes ;)

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Rain had never really bothered me, even when on one of my daily runs. Small talk made my day better because it gave the smallest thought in my head a voice. You see wind and say Oh no! Yet when I see wind, I see an opportunity to soar to greater heights. These things are small, but perfect to me, because all in all they make me feel free.

Yes, I adore the cold shiver up my spine in the morning in the fall and winter; it lets me know that it's time to embrace the day and live. Should it be strange to you that I love the pain in my legs when I beat my shoes on the pavement, then I feel sorry for you because when I run by you and see you just standing there, you're missing out on a wonderful feeling; still, I don't mind you staring at me, for it makes me feel proud of myself.

The coo of the birds, the smell of exhaust from an eighteen wheeler, and the splash of water on my face from a passing car; yes, these things I do not mind.

Optimism is the only true way of life because without even a little bit of it, you're sure to drown in your own self pity... So smile more, embrace the sunshine... and never mind the little things that could get you down.

Keep dreaming and don't miss out on tomorrow :)

Far Away, but Still Together; poetry for when you miss the ones you love

You start your days the same,

and yet I'm not there to feel so quiet and tame.
Your love clutches my heart when I'm away,

and it makes me wish you could hold me in your arms every day.

All my lovin', I will send to you,
all tied up in a box wrapped in blue.
The dawn is breaking,
and even though my heart is aching,
I still have to leave soon,
and dream of you when I look up at the moon.

Through the darkest of nights,
No matter how far you are from my sight,
I still love you all the same,
even when I'm not there to feel so quiet and tame.

(Ily ;) )

Birthday

I realized today that now I have made it another year in this amazing life, there are. So many little things I can do now that I couldn't do before. I can catch an R rated flick without having to fake my age or ask my date to cover for me. I am closer to being an adult, which is scary enough in itself, but no matter how scary life can seem, this is the one day of the year that everything makes sense.
Yes, another year older. Seems liberating to someone as young as I, but to some, it's just another reminder that the wrinkle on their brow is deepening and the medical bills are rising. I can only imagine what I'll be like when I'm a grown, middle-aged woman... I imagine having my own private psych practice in my home, an adoring husband, and two d arlings to boot; one boy and one girl, just like the family my mother and father created. Marie Alyce and Joseph Ethan, or maybe Douglas Ethan. I've always love the second boy name because they blend my grandfathers name and my younger brothers names into a fabulous family name. Alyce for a middle name for a baby girl because of my nana. Then maybe Harvey Robert for my other grandfather.
It's nice to dream of a future like this. I couldn't ask for anything better than that (except for a house on Nantucket or the cape). College will teach me how to be the psychologist I want to be, my parents will continue to show me how to live a life that's worth living, my brother will always be there for me, and my friends will never fade away from my memory.
It is so liberating to feel closer to my dreams as I have now turned another year older. So instead of gifts wrapped in strings and colored paper, I only wish to make the rest of today and this year perfect in every which way. Rain or shine, you will never see me frown or pout or scream or shout ever again. I love my life, so I think I owe one big thank you to the two people who made it possible...

Thank you mum and dad... You're the best parents a kid could ever ask for, I love you!

"Rainy Days Are Good For This" a poem for someone special

A poem for someone special

"Rainy Days Are Good For This"

It's grey and dark everywhere you look,

the rain just doesn't want to stop,

but you and I both know what that means.
Crack open that old story book,

play that rock and roll and let's dance until we drop;

Honey this is the kind of love you have in dreams.

Smell that damp air,

as you lay next to me tousling my hair.
Feel that cool, calm breeze
as I lace my fingers around yours with care.
Kiss me tenderly when the thunder rolls,
hold me close when the lightning crashes,
because we both know that in this place,
our fears are set aside.

Play me that Jack Johnson song,
the one about sleeping in bed all day,
that one about making banana pancakes.
Wrap your arms around me when the day grows long,
guarding me with their strength and keeping my fears at bay,
and kiss me again and again to keep me wide awake.

This is the perfect day;
not too hot,
not too cold.
Just damp and dreary...
Because rainy days are good for a love like this.

"Singing Lullabyes"; a poem for my parents

This poem is in special dedication to my mother and father, because without them, my dreams would have never been realized.

"Singing Lullabyes"

'Over in Killarney, many years ago....' my mother sang to me.

'Trot trot Boston, Trot trot to Lynn, watch out honey, you might fall in!'

my father shouted as I bounced on his knee.

Every time I bruised my shin,

or even had a youthful grin,

my parents were there,

watching me fly through time feeling light as the air.

Shoe lacing,

tongue tying,

or even a really good joke makes my father a king in my eyes.

Nerve wracking,

head scratching,

or even playfully proving my mother wrong makes my father a king in my eyes.

My mother,

his gorgeous queen,

with curls about her hair that could make any woman jealous,

she is the all powerful ruler of this home we live in.

Above all others,

in my eyes she gleams,

with love about her heirs that could make anyone love her.

As I am now grown,

my parents moanat the thought of seeing their baby girl go.

It's hard to imagine those days when I was so young,

to now be grown,

doing things on my own.

So a farewell to the lullabyes,

those days well spent,

and thank you to my family

for making my life so content.

............Better Now

A few weeks ago, my days as a dreamer had seemed to be over. There were no more dreams, only night mares. It scared me because when I fell asleep, I had no one in mind to help me find my way through my dreams. I feared that nothing could save me.

In dream psychology, there is such a thing as lucid dreaming, a dream that allows part of the conscious mind to be in partial or full control over the projections being put out by the subconscious of the dreamer. Many times when this happens it means that you are not getting a restful night's sleep, but in my case, I would beg anyone with such a condition... Until now.

You see, I try to write down all of my dreams that seem to have a good start, but can never finish it's description because towards the break of day, it all turns sour. Either someone is following me in the dark of my mind or I just want to find a high place to jump from. I'm always running... but it's better now

It is from research of my own sleep that i have found that when taking away sleep aids and adding positive life experiences that happen during waking hours to my memory, those memories imprint into those dark places hidden in my subconscious and shed light.

Recently, I have had one of the most positive life experiences and couldn't have hoped for anything better than what I have found. Head over heals for someone who I met by pure chance. How could this have happened to someone like me? My research, my notes, my time... all wasted because the answer to a perfect dream.... is love. Love is the answer to most every problem within one's life.

Webster defines love as so;

love/ləv/

Noun: An intense feeling of deep affection: "their love for their country".

Verb: Feel a deep romantic or sexual attachment to (someone)

 

Yes, the verb seems more meaningful in the state of mid that I am currently in, so in order to further my research as to how such person positively effects my dreams, I plan on pursuing this relationship and finding a way to spend every moment thinking of him... so in English (not in big psychology words), I'm better now because of him.

 

Thank you dear :)

Freedom within thyself is earned by yourself

A bit of self discovery can open your eyes to a whole new world and beginnings. We start out this journey young, and continue on through the ages, but as we age, we can lose sight of the freedoms that we once had as a child. Simple things like riding your bike across town or eating pizza and drinking soda. We put so many restrictions on our own lifestyle as we age that we bound ourselves to believing in those fru-fru magazine articles, TV ads, and Internet sights that tell you "your not good enough."

Let me tell you something, my little dreamers. It's not the media or your peers or those nasty on lookers that are to blame; it's you. You're to blame for being bound to believing in that garbage because you CHOSE to believe it. You made the unconscious decision to take those things to heart, then consciously you became upset by it and wrapped your life's meaning around it.

The problem with this is that your making yourself a bubble of self pity, holding up a sign that says "I have no self confidence." This is your kick in the butt.This is me waking you up saying that you need to exit that horrible bubble and enter into the real world, where people will respect you more if you respect yourself.

First things first, dust off what ever anyone said about you before, look yourself in the mirror, and pretend that you're telling off those horrible people; this will not only take a load off of your chest, but you won't hurt anyone in the process.

Next, find somethings that you can do on your own, like running, walking, or biking. Getting out and doing physical activities by yourself is not only good for your health, but will help you to become an strong, independent person whose personal outlook is better than ever made before. If you can do these things on your own, then you're on your way to becoming the person you've always wanted to be; strong, confident, and not to mention fit!

Finally, you must learn that not all things in life are bad. You can keep blaming yourself for the bad things that you had done and see past the good, or you can take the higher road and see that life is meaningful! You're an important person! If you dwell on the past, you'll stay there and you will never move forward in any aspect of your life.

That means you won't find a date (because you can't stop thinking about your ex), you won't ever win a race (because you can't stop replaying your collapse on the sidelines in your head), or you can't make the grade (because you can't stop thinking about how you failed before). All of these things will haunt you unless you learn to face them head on, explain to yourself that you're better than before, and that it will never happen again!

I didn't make this stuff up, it's real. This is how I got my life in check. Baby steps, little dreamers. Soon you'll all be on your way to making dreams of your own...

Enjoy life and accept the freedom that is within thyself!